he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
