I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
