so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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