The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
