just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
