Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
