So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
