Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring me the toilet please
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize