to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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