Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
this hospital has no fireball
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
