we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
