I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
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