Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
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