Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize