You made me cry and you don't even care
I can tuck mytits in my pants
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Did I show you my penis last night?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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