Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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