Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.