The brown eye won't let me do that either.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
