Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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