Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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