Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
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My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
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I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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