Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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