I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize