I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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