ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
