Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
