just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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