Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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