I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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