I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize