So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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