You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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