i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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