I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
