i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
