doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
