R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
babies were throwing up all over the place
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Congratulations! We have a period
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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