Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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