Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize