she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
