The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
