you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"