This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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