We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
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