Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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