people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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