she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
