I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
