That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize