Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
