I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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